Friday, February 15, 2013

I'm so confused

Which is nothing new. I found this post that apparently I forgot to  publish. It was interesting reading but feels like old history. But seeing as how it might come in hand to have something new up- like for those who are in bed puking like I was for weeks and always got super excited when I found something new to read- thought I'd throw it up anyway.

Rewind  9 months.

Baby is growing quite well. Kateri says my tummy  is bigger every morning. It certainly feels like it. I finally went shopping for some clothes. Shane said some of my things were getting a little squeezy. The next day I took them all back and started looking at maternity clothes instead. I thought I could get away with anything stretchy but it did not go so well. The  last time I really went shopping for maternity clothes, designers assumed you had grown to the size of a small SUV and that it would be great fun to put horizontal stripes and lots of funky gathers everywhere. And bows. Seriously, who needs rouching on an already sizeable piece of tacky floral print fabric? Of course, that was before all the actresses started having kids and making pregnancy another fashion opportunity for labels. I guess I am thankful for that.

I will be 17 weeks this Friday. Shane and I got to go hear the heartbeat again last week when I had some, still unexplained, bleeding. So far, in my pregnancy experiences that has only meant one thing. So I called my sister and she brought me supplies. Then I called Shane and he came home. Then the midwives called back and asked me to come in. Shane, wisely, told them we'd head in after I ate lunch. I can go longer stretches without snacks but it is best not to depend on that.  I felt completely fine and not at all like the other miscarriages. No hormone weirdness. No nausea or cramping or feelings reminiscent of transition. But it was reassuring to get checked out and hear the heart beat steady and strong. If it happens again we'll do an ultrasound, other wise we'll wait until the 20 week mark to get one. Which is fast approaching.

I am mostly caught up from appointments which had been put off due to the morning sickness. I still have Kateri's annual hearing test and check up, but they were booked out until July. And I need to get new orthodontist appointments on the books for the kids.

I did make it to the neurologist, though I am thinking I might look around some more. The new one is fine and I suppose I can't expect to just 'have' a relationship in one appointment, but it does not feel urgent right now anyway so I am fine for now. I just was not super excited or inspired by the visit. Not that is didn't go well. We did discuss some annoying symptoms I've been having off and on the past couple years where when I try to lie down to sleep, my leg- more specifically my calves-will spas out. Almost like a not painful charlie horse. Just a slow tightening of the muscle sometimes accompanied with a little jerk. I tried having Shane massage them and it helps a little, but when he stops, it starts. If I stand up I can't feel it, but I don't sleep standing up. So usually I get up and distract myself on the computer for a couple hours until I am tired enough to fall asleep anyway. I find my legs will sometimes feel sore in the morning- like I did have a bad cramp-so I am thinking I can count those nights as work out nights, no?  The only thing the Dr had to offer was muscle relaxants, which I have heard relax everything. I didn't know if that was code for 'you need to wear a diaper to bed' if you take it or 'your whole body will feel like rubber but  it is not every night so I have not tried anything in the past. And now I am sure I wouldn't be able to. I have found taking magnesium and potassium help  and stretching before lying down. It might be good practice for getting into a routine of not sleeping much at night and finding ways to pass the time but I still find it really, really annoying. Especially when it was coupled with morning sickness- sleep was the only reprieve I got.  Then Shane showed me Wordament, which works for now, but will be hard to play on my phone one handed while rocking a baby.

Maybe I should go back and see if the neurologist would prescribe massages for me. That kind of therapy I could get excited about. For now it is manageable so I'll just deal with it. Though I could still go for a deep tissue massage and a few hours at the spa. Maybe once a week would be good.

We've been having fabulous weather the past few days. I was a litltle caught off guard and actually got some really funky tan lines while watching the kids do slip'n'slide. Thankfully the next days were also very nice and I was able to correct the problem. It is very unusual to have gotten a dark tan in the middle of May. But I am so thankful it has been nice. The kids are living outdoors, I actually started planning and procuring some plants and seeds, and everyone is in a much better mood. Compared to a month ago, it feels like heaven. I will be super sad, but not surprised when it changes back to cold and rainy. Shane even went kiting today for the first time this year. He just got a new kite and board and was super excited to try them out. I told him it was his Father's Day present, which he is fine with.

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