Friday, June 21, 2013

Summer What?

Well, our summer is off to a normal Seattle start. It's been rainy the past two days. I took a picture through the back door. I didn't want to step out, because its all wet. We put the down blanket back on our bed last night, after having it off for awhile. I suppose it had to start cooling off to get ready for 4th of July. Another Seattle  tradition. But at least we have cousins coming to visit for the week, starting today. Never mind we might all be cooped up the whole time.

Pregnancy, on the other hand, is still off to a good start. But  I don't usually start to feel yucky until about week 6, and then feel better by week 12. Though I am still planning on not feeling queasy at all. I have started  making notes on quick snacks to keep around. I didn't try this one last time but for breakfast I'm  going to try a banana, strawberry, blueberry, kale, and cashew butter smoothie. I can chop and freeze it all then just blend in the morning.

Lately in the evenings I've been having whole wheat crackers with triple crème brie and apples. I am going to try and keep that up as well. Just because I really like it.

I was a little worried the other night in bed, the best time to worry, about Malachi and how long I'll be able to exclusively nurse him. He's been really fussy in the evenings. even if he goes to bed early, he'll wake up just to fit in his fussy time, which is generally from 9-11pm. Though he is not adverse to starting it earlier, if he feels the need. Or going later. The other night he extended it until midnight. Which was really fun because it coincided with my snack time so I got to try and assemble my crackers with one had while standing and bouncing up and down.  But I am trying to be very conscious of my diet so we powered through it.

So of course I start to worry maybe he is hungry and not getting enough.  Or, God forbid, should lose a chin .

I've never been pregnant this early. Usually it was after a year and they were eating some table food. So it feels weird to be thinking about his diet already. After doing some research and talking to my mom, which are the same thing, I felt better about sticking to the course of holding off on loading up the conveyor belt with the fridge contents and sitting Malachi in front of it. Instead I've just focused on making sure I get lots of nutrients and water.

                                                      What, fat boys get hungry too!

I've also been checking blogs of anyone with a baby near Malachi's age hoping to find a similar story. Come on, my baby is X months younger than yours. Aren't you pregnant too? But so far, no. I still wonder why I am. Malachi still nurses a lot at night, in the mornings, and all day. He's never not with me, unless he's napping and I make a Costco run. Nothing is different from my other kids.  I've only recently started to thin about exercising. The best I can some up with is Malachi has some big things to do in life, and he's going to need a side-kick.  If this baby comes out wearing boots and a cape I'll take that as a confirmation.

Speaking of Malachi coming out, I just realized I still have not posted the story of his arrival. It feels hard to go back and read what I did write down. Because it was hard. And I might just post what I wrote without revising it. And maybe that will remind me to  clean up some of the blood that is still on the floor trim. Yes, I have cleaned the bathroom since, it was just an out of the way spot so it was overlooked. For 8 months. But then I think 'you'll just have to clean it all up again in 9 months, maybe you should wait? Besides, you need a snack.'

On an even better note, this study says breastfeeding is OK for mom's with MS. And goes back on an older study that showed no benefit to prolonging the protective period that pregnancy affords by saying it actually does. Not that I needed anything to convince me that nursing was best. Sadly, the article does not state strongly that women 'should' breastfeed, just that they can. But when you read the research it is pretty clear that moms that breastfeed  are better off. As a side note, I have never had the much warned about post partum relapse.

Well, wherever you are, hopefully a sunnier place, I hope your summer is off to a great start. We'll dream about sprinklers and sunburns and enjoy free rootbeer floats that our grocery store is offering as consolation prizes for the crummy weather. Where, I will probably pick up some more cheese and apples.


Monday, June 17, 2013

XRJQZ&&&%#! : o : )

No, this is not a guest post by Malachi. The first part was a tribute to my Scrabble letters. The last part was my reaction when I finally found a gift for Father's Day. Shane is notoriously hard to get things for. The things he does not get for himself are things I'm not really qualified (or funded enough) to get him. Like, a 60ft catamaran or something. So instead, I found the most unique, literally one -of-a-kind presents I could find. And then I woke him up early to show him the test results. Because I know he needs his sleep on the weekends. But I knew he'd want to know and it was way too early to call anyone. I was going to take a picture of the little digital 'pregnant' symbol. But it was gone the next day and when I tried to pee on the second one it came up with an error symbol. So I looked up the  symbol in the manual and it said the results mean you need to do another test. Which I didn't have. Who can screw up peeing on a stick? Oh. Someone with 5 kids one of which is sitting on her lap while she tried to do said test ( I know. Too much information). That's who. So no cutesy picture of a positive test.

I was surprised, and not surprised. On Monday I went into the clinic. I wanted to make sure the UTI from the week before was all cleared up. I had sort of a funny slightly full feeling and it made me want to check it out. So I left the baby at home and ran up to not pee at the drs.

I had purposefully drank a large glass of water before I left. But much to my dismay, and drs surprise, I couldn't go. So we chatted a bit and I explained how it didn't feet like a typical UTI, but jus funny enough as to feel like something was trying to get my attention. And sometimes that is how UTIs start for me. They always ask if I'm pregnant and I always tell them there's always a chance. Unless  I AM pregnant. Then I tell them yes. So he said they could check that too. He looked over my charts and saw that every time I had come in suspecting something was amiss I had been right so he wrote me a prescription for the Monurol  again and we discussed what I might talk to the urologist about next week. It was all very nice. And finally I had to pee. He came back in and said,

"You were right."

At least about the leukocyte level being high. He said he'd call me in the next few minutes when he got the hcg results back, if it was positive. I went to the pharmacy and waited. He never called.

But, being the 'I love tests that tell me about me' kind of person  that I am, of course I came home and started peeing on things. But the first positive was not until Sat, so that will be useful information for the midwives as my cycles had not been perfectly regular. All two of them. Also, for anyone interested, because I always am, the 'practice' or warm up ovulation thing  is totally true. I had two periods of suspected ovulation, complete with lh surges and everything- I told you I liked tests. But the last one was the real one. Also, lh looks suspiciously like hcg, so if you get a string of positive lh tests you are probably pregnant. It was a good thing I was testing so often so I could pinpoint approximate implantation and then and not just tell the midwives 'surprise me' when it comes to calculating my due date.

So I might have a short window of actually coming up with real words at Scrabble. Before the pregnant brain sets in. If it ever left. I'm still not sure it did. Thank goodness for spellcheck.  Real words. Not just silly arrangements of letters pulled out of a bag like I think the MS drug companies do. Why else would they call things like Tysabri, Copaxone, or Tecfidera unless they were just going for points. Not 'easy to say easy to spell. I laughed out loud when I read the newest Plegridy. Really? That's the best they could come up with? It doesn't even have a Z in it. Another fun part is keeping the names straight all through the trial and release-to market phases. Just when you get a handle on BG-12, they go and change it to Tecfidera. Ok so Tysabri is a little easier than it's  natalizumab (sounds like a space alien name). I think they laugh when they come up with their silly names. 'Hey, guys. I got a good one. Even the neurologists won't know how to say this one without the secret decoder ring! Oh, and tomorrow we're doing no vowels.'

Marc Stecker's post informed me about the newest candidate in the funny names line-up. Whether or not you are interested in funny named drugs, MS research, or zombies you should check it out. His blog is Wheelchairkamikaze. The link is to the right.

(Haha. Spell check is having a hayday with all the drug names.)

Friday, June 14, 2013

Let Them Eat Food

Malachi is teething. Hard. One tooth is through, but the second is clearly giving him a hard time. Which is a hard time for all of us. Eating, bathing, and conversing are things of the past. I told Shane we should just get some French comedies as subtitles would allow us to actually get the movie. Instead of trying to read lips and coming away with vastly different plot themes. Were we watching the same movie? He was confessing to the murder? I thought he was professing his undying love and affection.

Teething tablets, Tylenol, frozen chewy rings. None make  much of a difference. He's also started nursing like he's smoking a cigarette. He takes long, slow drags. Then lies there contemplatively, the cigarette dangling from the corner of his mouth, and looks around before taking another puff. The he feels the cigarette slipping so he employs his newly emerged snaggle tooth and catches it just in time. At which point I take a sharp breath. Which scares him. So he cries some more and I cry some more and I wonder how the detective knew the murderer was the wife.

So I laughed, yesterday, when the therapist advised me to work on getting some time for myself. To exercise, think, grocery shop- without the distraction of kids. Actually, I had already set aside some time on my calendar next week. At 4am. To pee. These days that's about as luxurious as it gets. She also advised me to focus on nutrition and making every calorie count. As in make sure every calorie comes from butter, heavy cream, bacon sandwiches, or triple cream brie with crackers and apples. Or at least that is what I took it to mean. Given the few opportunities and the speed, and positions, which go with trying to get food past a grabby Muffin and into my mouth, the fewer in number and more calorie-dense in composition of each bite the better chance I won't pass out before the next meal. At this point I don't know if my freaky metabolism could support me, a growing fat boy, and  some jumping jacks.

I surprised myself last night when Shane, who had already worked late and through some of Malachi's evening fussiness - it gets worse at night-asked if it would work to take the big kids to see the midnight showing of Man of Steel. And I said sure. By work, it ended up meaning that Cyprian would discover they were going and he was not as he was awake when they left.   Because my kids stay up way too late and a midnight showing is not really a big stretch for them. His sadness would not be assuaged by the opportunity to camp out in mom and dad's room and Malachi, who was almost starting to stop whining, felt inspired by the competition  and set up wailing with renewed vigor. I was starting to regret my support as Cyprian threatened to pack his bags and leave and Malachi bit me for the umpteenth time. Then Kateri took the baby and walked and the  change of scenery and pace helped him finally quiet down and I slipped him a cigarette and  he went to sleep. Just about the time the movie was starting.

And I  was so not ready when Malachi started repeating all of the bushman's lines from The Gods Must Be Crazy. At five in the morning. He finally went down for a nap. 45 min ago. He's up now. Probably he sensed I was about to make lunch.

Saturday, June 8, 2013

I have 15 minutes before Malachi wakes up.

So this will be quick. Unfortunately, all day long he has only been taking 15 min naps. Spaced hours apart. Which for a growing boy who got up at a normal time, is not good. And when he is awake, he's not very content and is very opposed to mommy having a BLT, unless of course, I share. In other areas he stands for babies should always be held, moms should not eat, pee, do dishes with two hands. He is pro equal time with the laptop, and other annoying views that are not compatible with adults living a somewhat sane existence. He did finally pop a tooth earlier in the week so maybe he is working on another one. So far there have been no injuries due to said tooth. Which is surprising because he likes to play growly bear cub with everyone and gnaws on shoulders and faces with ferocity. And grab handfuls of hair every opportunity he gets. I think I will never wear my hair down again. But doing so would involve brushing it so it's not like that was ever going to happen anyway.
In the midst of all this, I was surprised with a revelation I had. I've been doing some research about women and the natural rhythms of life and made a discovery. PMS has been gotten a bad reputation, by what I think is just a misunderstanding. Normally a women's energies are focused on fertility, nourishing relationships, family and other cheerful female attributes. But once a month, her energies focus on the things beyond herself and with hawk-like precision, she is able to see and point out all that is wrong in the world. And then she uses her creativity and problem solving to instruct precisely how those wrongs are to be righted and who's job it is and when they should do it. With clarity of mind she is like a beacon, shining a spotlight on any and all areas where others need improvement. Rather than women separating themselves from polite society at this phase, they should realize their potential of the life coaches they are  and get recognized for the guidance they offer to others.
In other news, Malachi had his first food. Which actually turned out to not be food at all. Unless you are a cow. I wholly expected he would get his first food yesterday when I had an appointment and left him sleeping on the couch with Shane for a couple hours. I was hoping he would take a long one as he had gotten up really early. But his Napoleon napping schedule was starting and he woke up not long after I left. I figured I would come home to him eating steak. He was fine. And though he makes stealthy swipes at anything anyone is attempting to nourish themselves with, has so far been unsuccessful at getting any himself. Successful at knocking plates and food on the floor but not in his mouth. So today he decided to really go for it and worked his fat little fingers to edge of the blanket and plucked some grass. He was not as entertained by the flavor as he was at the process of getting it so I let him dig around and pull grass. Then had to wrestle him later to wash his hands and clean out all the dirt from his fingernails. Its going to be a fun summer.

We walked down to the new construction site where the kids like to play and he was not happy sitting in the stroller so I put his blanket on the dusty ground and he was super excited to scrunch his fingers in the rocky dirt.

It's actually a pretty cool area, complete with cattails and a little watery thing for doinking rocks into. The kids could play there all day walking the tire tracks, playing Mars rover, the Sandlot, or abandoned children. Actually, they are there right now. I brought Malachi home for a nap, figuring we'll be back in 15 min. Maybe I should have packed them some food. In case he naps longer and they get hungry. Its very dry and there are no signs of wildlife or edible vegetation. Otherwise, I'd trust Kateri to set up camp and rustle up some grub.

Speaking of Kateri, she just came back to tell me she got her first bee sting. Actually, she got two of them. She didn't even cry. One is on her cheek. So that will be interesting to watch. And Malachi is up. What's that I sense? something is wrong in the universe? I must be off then.